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On the wall of fame in my home are pictures of newborns, and the yearly birthday photo of each child and grandchild. In some of those family portraits, the extreme level of overwhelm shows overwhelmingly in my face. The condition is visible in my eyes. We greet one another with, “How are you?” The response is predictable. “Keeping busy.” As if being busy is the goal. “I’m at capacity,” my adult daughter described.

When I moved to the country, the elderly neighbor asked, “When do you sit out?”

In the Midwest, couples sit on their porch in the evening, watch the Canadian geese silhouetted against the sunset wave to neighbors who pass by, and connect over a glass of lemonade.

I didn’t even own outdoor chairs.

Schedules are filled with the demands of career, making a home, nurturing relationships, minding our health and the wellbeing of those who depend on us, connecting to spiritual community, staying current on finances and world events, rotating tires, flossing teeth, cleaning the refrigerator coils and furnace filters. Toss in holidays, open houses, sports games, music recitals, and needed vacation days requiring extra preparation from putting a hold on the mail to arranging pet care.

When Overwhelm Steals Your Peace

Insidious, overwhelm is the result of the daily war between the important and the urgent.

Signs of overwhelm include:

• Delayed, skipped, or rushed quiet time with the Lord
• Discontent
• Destructive patterns
• Depression, anxiety, and feelings of failure
• Drama 

The story goes that the British Rowing Team was not producing wins. Team members adopted a practice to filter everything they did through the question, “Will this make the boat go faster?”

Does

• Avoiding exercise make the boat go faster?
• Choosing the urgent rather than the important make the boat go faster?
• Consistently skipping sleep make the boat go faster?

What do you want your life to look like in three weeks, three months, and three years? What prevents you from making progress toward your goals? Pam and Bill Farrel, founders of Love Wise, began weekly Marriage Meet-Ups. As a couple, they track their current lifestyle and make purposeful course adjustments toward goals and away from destructive overwhelm.

No More Overwhelm

Even good things can be the wrong things for this moment. Frustration results from thinking that after the urgent is addressed, we can surrender to our soul-satisfying, God-given calling.

The first step away from overwhelm is choosing what you won’t do. “You cannot overestimate the unimportance of practically everything,” said John Maxwell.

Author Greg McKeown defines productivity in his book, Essentialism, as a disciplined, systematic approach to determine where our highest point of contribution lies, then making the execution of those important things nearly effortless. In this way, the focus shifts from how to get more things done to getting the right things done.

To operate at your highest point of contribution, prayerfully ask God for his plan for you and set that direction as your priority. Like Michelangelo carving away all the stone that wasn’t David, purposely release the urgent that crowds out God’s unique design for you.  

Steve Jobs said, “People think focus means saying yes to the thing you’ve got to focus on. But that’s not what it means at all. It means saying no to the hundred other good ideas that there are. You have to pick carefully. I’m actually as proud of the things we haven’t done as the things I have done. Innovation is saying no to 1,000 things.”

Don’t Neglect Your Wellbeing

Optimum clarity, energy, and productivity are rooted in good health. Essentials include

• Sleep: seven to eight hours nightly
• Stillness: for Bible reading
• Solitude: to hear God
• Sabbath: weekly do what refreshes your soul
• Solid, caring relationships

Don’t Be Overwhelmed By Decision Fatigue 

Conserve the energy and time required to make decisions by automating.

Begin your day investing in your most valuable resource – yourself. Rise early to journal, study, pray, eat well, and exercise. Waking at the last minute, grabbing coffee, and dashing out the door is a day of reacting to demands rather than responding purposefully and thoughtfully.

Automate finances, set up regular contributions to savings and investments. Auto bill pay streamlines your to-do list. Let your calendar remind you of important dates such as birthdays and holidays far enough in advance to respond in a timely manner. Build simplicity into your life by setting reminders on your phone for car maintenance, dental visits, and the annual chimney cleaning.

Don’t Be Overwhelmed By Shame

Words can give life or overwhelm with shame. Speak to yourself with the same kindness and grace you give to those you love. Eliminate criticizing, complaining, condemning, and excuses.

Replace

• “I should… ”
• “We need to… ”
• “I ought to… ”
• “I must… ”

with “I choose to,” for those actions that align with your values and calling. “For the Scripture says, ‘Everyone who believes in him will not be put to shame.’” (Romans 10:11) We should avoid blaming ourselves for things God has forgiven us for, or holding on to things that feel shameful only because we are playing the comparison game with others.

Don’t Overwhelm Your Boat

Being consistently overwhelmed can indicate a habit of pursuing easier paths to the less important. Before adding to the calendar, ask does this

• Align with my values?
• Move my goals forward?
• Add to the overwhelm stealing my peace?

One friend does not attend home parties. If she likes the product, she gives her order but saves her schedule for her priorities. One couple makes an automatic monthly donation to a ministry. Each month is a gift to someone who receives a notice of the contribution in their name on their birthday.

Don’t Be Overwhelmed By Panic

Do things ever turn out as planned? Regardless, remain confident that God is at work even in this. What is he teaching you about his character in this setting? Living in overwhelm is the antithesis of the life we want. 1 Peter 5:7 states: “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” (NIV) We can trust God to calm our anxieties and to guide our focus to the right areas.

Overwhelm chips away happiness and health, as caught on film and framed in my family photos. Filter what you do personally and corporately through the question, “Will this move me toward my goals?”

To reduce overwhelm in your life, what is on your won’t-do list?

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