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True Friendship

by: Kristen Hogrefe Parnell

One of my sweetest friendships developed in the most unlikely place. She walked into the interview, and the HR director and I hired her. 

You know how some people radiate the light of Jesus? Rachel is one of them, and I realized after working with her for a short time that we could be best friends. We were both about the same age, recent college graduates with similar interests, and active in sister churches in our community.

Ultimately, only one Friend will never leave or forsake us.

Except that I was her boss. 

Regardless, we worked great together. Then, the unthinkable happened. Due to the economic recession of the late 2000s, my company had layoffs. In my department, the powers-that-be chose to let the most recent hire go.  

Rachel.

I will never forget walking her out of the building and to her car. We were both bawling, and all I could think was, “She is going to hate me.” 

But God had other plans. Rachel was eventually rehired into a different department. Since I was no longer her boss, we could easily develop our friendship. Long story short, we were both in each other’s weddings and though we live states apart now, we stay in touch and see each other about once a year.

While a few rare ones endure through life’s changes, some friendships are just for a season.

I wish I could say that every friendship turns out this way. Many of mine have not. While a few rare ones endure through life’s changes, some friendships are just for a season. Some can even be a source of pain and disappointment. Since we all have a sin nature and live in a fallen world, our friendships will never be perfect. 

Ultimately, only one Friend will never leave or forsake us (Hebrews 13:5). Whether we seem all put together or a “hot mess,” this Friend won’t discriminate in loving us. For that reason, He earned the nickname, “friend of tax collectors and sinners” (Matthew 11:19 NIV).

Of course, this Friend is none other than Jesus Himself. His model for friendship teaches us the best way to be a friend: by putting others before ourselves. “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others” (Philippians 2:3-4, NIV).

What other Scriptures can help us become better friends to each other?

John 15:13: “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” (NIV)

Proverbs 27:17: “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.”  (NIV)

Proverbs 17:9: “Whoever would foster love covers over an offense, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.”  (NIV)

Romans 12:10: “Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.”  (NIV)

Proverbs 17:17: “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.”  (NIV)

Proverbs 27:6: “Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.”  (NIV)

Proverbs 18:24: “One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”  (NIV)

God,

Thank You for being the perfect model of what a true Friend is. Help me follow Your example and be a selfless, kind, forgiving, truthful, and faithful friend. When I disappoint my friends or fail them, may I be quick to ask forgiveness. When I have a conflict with a friend, teach me how to wisely pursue reconciliation. If I feel lonely, remind me of Your love for me and help me be willing to take the initiative to pursue friendships. May my friendships be honoring to You and be mutually sharpening so that we help each other grow closer in our relationship with You. 

In Jesus’ name, Amen.

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Kristen Hogrefe Parnell

Kristen Hogrefe Parnell writes suspenseful fiction from a faith perspective for women and young adults. Her own suspense story involved waiting on God into her thirties to meet her husband, and she desires to keep embracing God’s plan for her life when it’s not what she expects. Kristen’s books have won the Selah Award and the Grace Award, among others, and her latest novel, Hold Your Breath, is now available. A former English teacher, she now spends most of her time at her favorite assignment to date: being a mom to her toddler. Kristen and her family live in Florida, and you can find her online at KristenHogrefeParnell.com.

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