“Those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength.” ~ Isaiah 40:31 NKJV

Waiting is my absolute favorite thing to do. I crush waiting.

Said no one ever, right?

In reality, waiting is definitely not my favorite thing. In fact, it’s a struggle. It’s something I have to actively coach myself through. Preferably with prayer, but often with distraction—a book on my phone, a song, a text, or even a bit of doom scrolling.

Otherwise, I tend to get crushed by the waiting. It opens my mind up to overthinking and fear. Worries and what-ifs creep in, or—depending on the day—crash in, sending my thoughts, emotions, and actions into a tailspin. 

And I can’t help but think that’s at least part of what happened to Peter in that courtyard before the rooster crowed.

No, Not Me!

Jesus tried to warn His disciples that they would desert and deny Him. Specifically, He warned Peter. In response, Peter declared,

“Even if I have to die with you, I will never deny you!” (Matthew 26:35)

In my mind’s eye, I see Jesus gently shaking His head. His eyes are filled with sorrow as He says, 

“This very night, before the rooster crows, you will disown me three times” (Matthew 26:75 niv)

Because it’s easy to say “I would never” in the midst of your friends and in the safety of the familiar, isn’t it? But when faced with an angry crowd and ugly accusations, in the dark of the night, it suddenly became much harder. 

Waiting By the Fire

Though Peter fled the Garden of Gethsemane with all the other disciples at Jesus’ arrest, he made his way back to the high priest’s courtyard outside of Jesus’ trial. The night was chilly and someone had built a fire. Peter huddled near to warm himself . . . to worry and to wait.

So when the servant girl asked if he were one of Jesus’ disciples, fear answered for Peter and said, “I don’t know him” (Luke 22:57 niv). 

More waiting, and another man said, “You also are one of them” (v. 58). Peter’s denial was sharper this time. Still more waiting as Peter watched the fire burn down to ashes and felt his faith crumbling with it. So when the third accusation came, it was met with a third denial, with exclamations, and with curses. And then . . . the rooster crowed. 

Peter Remembered

At that very moment, Jesus turned and looked at Peter. And Peter remembered. 

He remembered Jesus’ warning. 

He remembered his own brash vow.

He remembered his denials.

Peter fled once again. Not from fear this time, but rather from his own failure. His heart shattered by what he had done.

Not Finished with Him

But Jesus wasn’t finished with Peter. Yes, there was more darkness and heartbreak to walk through. And yes, there was more fear, more waiting, more worry. 

But in just a few days, Jesus would appear in a locked room, bringing mercy and hope with Him. And a few days after that, He would appear on a beach with breakfast prepared, and He would say to Peter, “Feed my lambs. . . . Take care of my sheep. . . . Feed my sheep” (John 21:15–17 niv). Three directives to replace the three denials.

What This Means for Us

We won’t always get it right. There will be times when we know exactly what we should do, and we don’t. Maybe it’s because of fear or overthinking or just stubborn rebellion. Maybe we get caught up in the wait and worry and lose our way. 

No, it’s not okay to get it wrong. But when we do, we don’t have to panic or run away. Rather we need to run to Jesus. The One who can make it all right. The One who can make us all right.

God, please forgive me for the times I know right and choose wrong. Help me to stay faithful to You, especially in the times of worry and waiting. Amen.

Reflection Questions:

Has waiting ever caused you to worry, question, or stumble? How does Jesus make you right with Him?

What can you do in the waiting to keep you close to Jesus?